Sunday, 30 March 2014

A Definitive And Important Ranking Of Animal Penises

This post is NSFW(ildlife).


Bean weevil.


Bean weevil.


This is the absolute worst penis. The bean weevil is a beetle that uses traumatic insemination and its wang is basically made of nightmares.


Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences


Cat.


Cat.


This is also a horrible penis. It's got keratin barbs, which scrape out competing sperm and stimulate ovulation. And hurt.


Via ebaumsworld.com


Flatworm.


Flatworm.


This is a pretty bad penis. Flatworms have male and female reproductive organs and don't want to get pregnant so they end up "fencing" with their dicks and the first one to get stabbed has the babies.


Via youtube.com


Dolphin.


Dolphin.


This is a kind-of-scary penis. You wouldn't like it if a dolphin tried to have sex with you. And they do try. They're pretty much permanently horny. For e.g. there was that time one of them masturbated with a decapitated fish and racked up millions of YouTube views as a result.


Via youtube.com




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