Three is not company, stop it with your lies 1970s sitcoms.
Coming home to a home-cooked meal! That is not for you.
The fuck am I supposed to eat?
Instead of a welcome home kiss after work, you get Pottery Barn catalogs in your pile of mail.
Just what I need! A fucking apothecary table.
When you have a bad day, but only one person is getting cuddled on the couch.
Time to invest in a stuffed animal.
In general, the couch is reserved for them so you’re always relegated to a chair.
Ikea chairs do NOT care about back support!
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