Tuesday 30 September 2014

15 Supposedly "Sexy" Things That Are Actually Awkward

FutureSex/AwkwardSound.


Grinding.


Grinding.


The supposedly "sexy" mashing of genitals as a form of dance. Achieving grinding synchronicity is an art achieved by few. At its best, you and your dance parter look like you're publicly masturbating. At its worst, you and your partner look like two plastic dolls performing anal intercourse.


tumblr.com


Dancing seductively on objects.



This is a supposed way to make dancing EVEN SEXIER. Dancing on things is dangerous. Especially in heels. Especially in a bathroom. Only attempt this if you also think falling on your ass is sexy.


instagram.com


Eating as if your food is a penis.


Eating as if your food is a penis.


Trying to act sexy while ingesting a phallic food item is awkward. Do people do this in real life? AND ACTUALLY MEAN IT? Like, I'm giving a popsicle a blow job and it's supposed to be serious??


NBC / tumblr.com


Cybersex.


Cybersex.


Everyone who wants ass online is lying. Everyone is an awkward weirdo. No one is sexy.


HBO / tumblr.com




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