Tuesday, 30 December 2014

122 Of The Most Important TV Deaths Of 2014

Even without the Red Wedding, this was one of the bloodiest years for TV in recent memory. Warning: MAJOR SPOILERS for just about every television series. (Seriously.)


Pierce Hawthorne (Chevy Chase), Community


Pierce Hawthorne (Chevy Chase), Community


Chevy Chase's drama-filled time spent on the beloved NBC comedy ended with his decision to leave the show before what was to be its final season. (Of course, that was before it was resurrected by Yahoo! for a sixth season sans movie.) That also meant an early end for his character, Pierce Hawthorne. It was jarring watching the lighthearted show deal with something as serious as Pierce's death, but Community did so with its signature quirky comedy mixed with some schmaltz, i.e., his Greendale eulogy, which read: "Pierce Hawthorne, 14-year Greendale student, entrepreneur and expert heart attack faker passed away. For real this time. Pierce had been recently banned from campus, but not from our hearts. He's survived by many ex-wives and all of us here at Greendale who called him a friend. If you're listening, Pierce, you were a hell of a D&D player. It's time to level up." (Side note: It was later revealed that Pierce died of "dehydration from filling up all those cylinders" of his sperm that he left his fellow Greendale students.) RIP Piercinald Anastasia Hawthorne, but no thank you for that parting gift.


NBC


Madame LaLaurie (Kathy Bates), American Horror Story: Coven


Madame LaLaurie (Kathy Bates), American Horror Story: Coven


When American Horror Story fans first met Madame Delphine LaLaurie on the anthology series' third season, the 19th-century Louisiana socialite was happily torturing her slaves in the most unimaginable ways possible (like, making them minotaurs, for example). But eventually, she got her due: She was buried alive, unburied and made a slave, and eventually decapitated. And when she arrived in hell, she watched as her rival burned her daughter in the same chambers she tortured her own slaves in decades earlier. Karma really is a bitch, just like LaLaurie.


FX


Marie Laveau (Angela Bassett), American Horror Story: Coven


Marie Laveau (Angela Bassett), American Horror Story: Coven


Madame LaLaurie's rival was famed voodoo priestess and owner of the Cornrow City salon Marie Laveau. Her cackle, skin, and magic were flawless, but that wasn't enough to save her. Before she met her own end, LaLaurie managed to attack Laveau, knocking her unconscious. Then, she dissected her body, spreading various parts all around New Orleans. And if that weren't bad enough, Laveau met LaLaurie again in the afterlife, where she was forced to spend eternity torturing LaLaurie's innocent daughters, which wasn't as fulfilling for Laveau as she would've imagined in theory.


FX


Fiona Goode (Jessica Lange), American Horror Story: Coven


Fiona Goode (Jessica Lange), American Horror Story: Coven


Even the Supreme wasn't safe on Coven. Fiona yearned for eternal life and became particularly desperate for it when she was diagnosed with terminal cancer (which wasn't a surprise considering the woman smoked like a glamorous chimney clad in black designer cocktail frocks). But even after coming up with a master plan — implanting a vision of her fake murder in the brain of the serial killer she was having a love affair with (Danny Huston) — Fiona still met her end the natural way, letting her daughter Cordelia (Sarah Paulson) reign Supreme. In her own personal hell, she was bound to spend eternity in a shack with Huston's Axeman that smelled like fish and cat piss. Oh, and it was made of knotty pine. THE HORROR!


FX




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